You wake up, your dream still clinging to you like water to fur. You turn off your alarm, wishing you had another four hours to get more sleep. Last night is a blur. Memories of drinking come to mind, but you can't remember how much, or with who. This troubles you.
You are normally very careful not to drink with strangers. You've heard the stories. You've read the news. You feel a sharp pain shoot through your body. What is this?
You feel yourself. There's blood. You call 9-1-1.
Your mind is racing. Who could have done this? Why would they do this to you?
You arrive at the hospital. Everything smells like rubbing alcohol and shame.
You strip naked, exposing yourself, feeling even more violated. Strange people in white coats put objects into you. "Taking samples" they call it.
You wish it was all over.
Police come and talk to you. You tell them you can't remember anything. They seem supremely uninterested in what happened, as if they're only there because it's their job.
Everything is a blur. Everything was a blur last night too. Are you being raped all over again, or is justice happening to you?
Your fate seems out of your control.
Tears have been streaming down your face for the last few hours. When did that start?
You can't remember who you were before this happened. It's a new level of existence, but it's a hell.
The judge is looking at you, asking you if you need a minute. The tears are streaming down your face again. The jury is looking at you. They look uncomfortable. It's hard to watch a grown man cry.
The woman is leaving. There is no jail time for her.
You're holding the gun in your hands. Tears are streaming down your face again. When did these start again?
The therapist said this feeling would be normal, but the therapist doesn't feel it. You feel it.
Click.
You are normally very careful not to drink with strangers. You've heard the stories. You've read the news. You feel a sharp pain shoot through your body. What is this?
You feel yourself. There's blood. You call 9-1-1.
Your mind is racing. Who could have done this? Why would they do this to you?
You arrive at the hospital. Everything smells like rubbing alcohol and shame.
You strip naked, exposing yourself, feeling even more violated. Strange people in white coats put objects into you. "Taking samples" they call it.
You wish it was all over.
Police come and talk to you. You tell them you can't remember anything. They seem supremely uninterested in what happened, as if they're only there because it's their job.
Everything is a blur. Everything was a blur last night too. Are you being raped all over again, or is justice happening to you?
Your fate seems out of your control.
Tears have been streaming down your face for the last few hours. When did that start?
You can't remember who you were before this happened. It's a new level of existence, but it's a hell.
The judge is looking at you, asking you if you need a minute. The tears are streaming down your face again. The jury is looking at you. They look uncomfortable. It's hard to watch a grown man cry.
The woman is leaving. There is no jail time for her.
You're holding the gun in your hands. Tears are streaming down your face again. When did these start again?
The therapist said this feeling would be normal, but the therapist doesn't feel it. You feel it.
Click.